My Subconscious Is a Drama Queen 👸

 Listen… phantom smells are weird.

But nothing — nothing — prepares you for the kind of dream where you wake up like,

“Did that just happen? Am I in trouble? Should I call someone?”

The other night, my brain said,

“Let’s have fun.”
And wrote me a thriller starring my neighbors with the never-ending lights.

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The Plot (According to My Subconscious):

• I’m at home, minding my business.

• Mr. Lights-Always-On casually strolls into my house like he’s auditioning for MTV Cribs: Uninvited Edition.

• He starts looking at everything.

• I suddenly realize… my walls are decorated with pictures of him. Hanging. On. String. Like some kind of creepy Pinterest craft board.

• Plot twist: he’s a baseball player.

• Cue me waking up, heart pounding, thinking, “Well, that was awkward.”

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Dream Logic, Am I Right?

The worst part?
It felt so real.
I woke up genuinely scanning my walls like, “Please tell me I didn’t hang a shrine to my neighbor-slash-baseball-player.”

My subconscious?
A messy little director who doesn’t care about continuity or consent.

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Takeaways From This Midnight Soap Opera:

• Dreams can make you guilty of crimes you didn’t commit (like creepy neighbor décor).

• Trauma, stress, or just too much TikTok before bed? Who knows.

• Always check your walls when you wake up.

• Maybe don’t fall asleep thinking about your neighbors’ lights.

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In Conclusion:

If you ever wake up from a dream like that, just remember:
It’s your brain’s late-night improv show, not a confession.
And for the record, Mr. Lights-On — if you really were a baseball player,
my subconscious would still prefer you stay on your side of the fence.