Patience is Overrated: Confessions of an Impatient Queen 👑

Let’s just get one thing straight: I have about as much patience as a toddler in line at Disney World on a 95-degree day. You know the type—red-faced, sweaty, vibrating with rage because Mickey is taking too long to show up. That’s me. Except instead of Mickey, I’m waiting on… well, everything.

Patience is supposed to be a virtue. That’s what the calm, centered yoga-doing, herbal-tea-sipping types keep telling us. But for the rest of us mere mortals? Patience feels less like a virtue and more like a slow-burning torture method.

The Myth of Patience

“Good things come to those who wait.”
Really? Because last time I waited in a drive-thru for 20 minutes, all I got was cold fries and the wrong drink order. Where’s the “good” in that?

Society has sold us this Pinterest-worthy idea that patience is all about peace and acceptance. But in reality, patience feels like being trapped in limbo, pacing back and forth, checking your watch like it’s going to suddenly fast-forward time. Spoiler: it won’t.

The Awkward Middle Place

The worst part of impatience is the “in-between” phase.

You’ve done your part.
You’ve shown up.
You’ve put in the effort.

And now? You wait.

Waiting is like being at the world’s slowest karaoke night. You know your turn is coming, but Chad is up there belting Bon Jovi like his life depends on it, and you’re just stuck, clapping awkwardly, praying for mercy.

Signs You Might Be Chronically Impatient

Let’s diagnose this like a WebMD article:

Do you check the oven every three minutes while baking cookies? (They still look like dough? Shocking.)
Do you tap the “track package” link so often your mail carrier feels personally stalked?
Do you scream “COME ON!” at red lights as if the universe is in charge of your commute?
Do you click “refresh” like it’s your cardio for the day?

Congratulations, my friend—you too may be suffering from the common affliction known as Impatientus Maximus.

Why It’s So Dang Frustrating

Here’s the thing about impatience: it’s not just about waiting. It’s about the lack of control.

When you’re impatient, you’ve already done all you can, but the rest isn’t up to you. And that’s maddening. Like putting your fate in the hands of that one group project partner who shows up late and forgets the PowerPoint slides.

Impatience makes us feel powerless. And no one likes that. Well, maybe toddlers. They seem fine with screaming into the void. But the rest of us? We want action. We want results. We want it now.

A tired-looking woman in gray pajamas with one shoulder exposed, resting her face on her hand, showing frustration and impatience

The Hilarious Things We Do While Waiting

When we’re impatient, logic takes a back seat. We do ridiculous things like:

Checking the same email inbox seventeen times in an hour.
Refreshing an app like it’s going to sprout new features if we glare hard enough.
Saying “I’ll just check one more time” until “one more” turns into fifty.
Having imaginary conversations with the universe:

“If I hit refresh and nothing’s changed, I’m flipping this table.”

If aliens ever observe us, they won’t think we’re technologically advanced. They’ll think we’re weird little creatures who worship progress bars and loading wheels.

The Great Irony

Here’s the kicker: impatience doesn’t make things happen faster. Shocking, I know. But somehow, our brains refuse to accept this.

It’s like believing that screaming at the microwave will make it heat your leftovers quicker. (Full confession: I’ve done this. The burrito did not care.)

Impatience just makes the waiting feel longer. It stretches time like bad taffy. One minute turns into a year, and suddenly you’re spiraling: “What if it never happens? What if this is all a mistake? What if the burrito stays cold forever?”

When Patience Finally Runs Out

There’s a breaking point. We all hit it. That moment where you go from simmering annoyance to full-blown “I’m done” mode.

For some, it’s stomping out of line and abandoning the cart.
For others, it’s dramatically sighing and giving a death stare to everyone around you.
And for people like me, it’s deciding, “Fine! If the universe won’t move, I will,” and then proceeding to pace like a caffeinated panther.

Spoiler: pacing does not actually speed up time. But it does burn a few extra calories, so I guess that’s a win?

The Honest Truth

Here’s the uncomfortable truth bomb: impatience is frustration dressed up in a fancy coat. And frustration comes from caring. We’re impatient because we actually want the thing. If we didn’t care, we wouldn’t bother waiting at all.

So maybe impatience isn’t weakness—it’s proof of passion. Proof that we’re hungry for results, excited for change, desperate for forward motion.

Still annoying as hell, though.

How I Try (and Fail) to Cope

They say you should breathe deeply, meditate, focus on the present. You know what I say? Ha!

My version of coping looks more like:

Distracting myself with snacks (preferably crunchy ones).
Talking to my dogs like they’re in charge of the universe’s timeline.
Creating elaborate mental timelines that definitely will not happen.
Writing snarky blog posts about how I have no patience.

Does it work? Meh. Does it make me laugh? Absolutely.

Final Sass: Calm Your Inner Gremlin

If you’re like me—tired of waiting, tired of being told to “just relax”—here’s my advice:

Embrace your inner impatient gremlin.
Roll your eyes.
Tap your foot.
Refresh the page a hundred times if you want.

Because at the end of the day, patience may be a virtue, but impatience is a whole personality—and honestly? It’s way more entertaining.

The Creative Nest